I had my second treatment last week and it was not fun at all. I was in the hospital from Monday to Saturday and it was a very difficult week…between the tiredness, nausea, confusion and all the other crap you experience when on this stuff, it wasn't a lot of fun. By the end of the five days, just brushing my teeth was something I would lay in bed and think about…it's hard to describe what it's like when such a trivial task becomes so difficult, but for some reason it was. One minute I'd be fine, and I would lay down for a quick nap, then wake up six hours later and have no idea what day it was or anything. It's funny though, because within one day of getting out of the hospital I started to feel better and literally got stronger and felt better every hour. By now I am starting to feel normal again and I should be recovered just in time for my next treatment! I've lost my hair, finally and I think I look funny bald. Good thing for hats!!
The worst part is just being in the hospital (it feels like I've spent half of August in the hospital…close to it). The staff at Crouse are awesome, and make it a lot better than it could be, but just laying there in that 8x10 room for so long really takes it's toll on you. You start to feel like you don't want to do anything but stare at the clock and count down the hours until you go home. Because of the chemo I don't eat most of the time I am there (I eat more towards the end of the week), so you get weak and by the last day I am literally sitting there starting at the clock.
The next steps are going back to Houston (this week) to make sure the treatment is working. I am pretty sure it is, but they want to be sure before continuing me on this therapy. I will have the regular tests done and then we will meet with Dr. Ravi to see whether the tumor has shrunk since treatment started, as well as to see if the other spots are still active. It will also be important to make sure there aren't any new tumors. After that, I go back to the hospital on Tuesday to start my third treatment (I go in Tuesday because of the holiday). We are going to talk to Dr. Ravi about the potential of getting the therapy as an outpatient, but I am not going to get my hopes up on that.
Even though these have been the worst weeks of my life, I've still got a great attitude about this. I tell myself all the time that this treatment is what I need to survive this cancer and I am willing to endure it for as long as I need to if it will put me in remission. My support system is amazing - Shana, my parents and family are always there when I need them, and I am so grateful for them. Thanks you guys.