Well, it's been a year since my diagnosis and I think I've grown more in this past year than any year of my life. Obviously there have been a lot of hard days and times, but there's been some great times as well, so looking back, I'd say I've had a pretty good year. I consider myself very lucky and aside from a miracle, I don't think I could be in a better situation with this cancer than I am right now, and I am proud of how far I've come, and how positive things have gone over the past 12 months. I could use a break from the chemo, but I am not much of a complainer.
I just completed my fourth chemo treatment of the AIM regimen and it's really horrible for a couple of days, then it's not so bad. Being in the hospital really sucks - for the first few days I can work, read, etc but the last two or three days, when the drugs start to hit me, I don’t do anything but lay in bed, half conscious, often not knowing what day or time it is - that's the worst part of it. I have visitors that I don't remember, I hallucinate pretty bad the last two days and I absolutely HATE being in the hospital. That's the worst part - it would be great if I could be home, in my own bed (chair or couch), but being there, as GREAT as the staff on Four South are, really, really sucks after six days. I love the staff there though - the doctors, PA's, nurses and assistants are amazing people and do work that I couldn't imagine doing…thanks so much to them and the way they treat patients (and patients families!).
There have been some stupid complications - like an infected port (the thing they put my chemo in through in my chest) which is requiring me to get IV antibiotics at home through a machine, which is very disruptive to Shana (not so much to me since I just sit here and work all day anyway).
Before my last treatment we took our annual football trip, and like usual, the Bills got ROLLED. Next year we are going to a Giants game so we can see a NY team win. Miami was great, the weather was amazing and we saw a Metallica concert (it's been like 15 years since I've seen them and they rocked!) which was great. It was a nice break, and because of it I got an extra week between treatment which I think helped me a lot.
Coming up for me are two more chemo treatments from Crouse (hopefully only two!) We are going back to Houston next week to get scans and meet with Dr. Ravi, and we will push him to give us a little idea of what he thinks is next. As I have been saying for 12 months now, I am hoping it's surgery, but you never know, he could opt for more chemo (but as I said above, I need a break from this stuff). I will have my last AIM treatment (for life as any more would be too toxic) in mid-November and then I am hoping we can get surgery scheduled for sometime in early January (in Houston). Fingers crossed…
I've got a lot of emails over the last few weeks and I can't believe it's been over a month since my last post. I pledge to keep this blog updated more frequently because I know people that care about me are checking it and I VERY much appreciate it, and continue to appreciate all of the love and support we get from the wonderful people in our lives!!